Friday, finally I came to school today and attend my last lesson for this week. Though I only need to attend for 2 days this week, but I have no mood to study at all. And Chinese New Year is coming soon. I don’t feel like attending and going anywhere. It makes me sick when the same thing is going to happen again once every year. I had to fake a smile on my face, pretending to be happy.
I don’t feel like going home so early because I don’t want to look at my mum’s face. Forget about her, I just told hwee wun about my personal story. Tomorrow’s a Saturday; I wonder what I can do for tomorrow or will I just slack again like last week. If my sis coming back, then at least I have a company to talk to rather just by myself. If not I’ll just read books and look at my laptop the whole day as usual. Life is so boring; I wish there some things to happen in my life. Like going off to somewhere to relax or able to leave this place forever for good.
Still in school at the moment, thinking if what I should do later. Should I go home or go out alone? I don’t know. I just don’t want to be home so early. It’s so stressful at home and I don’t feel comfortable staying there at all. I gave my comfy room to my mum, and then I move out to my study room to sleep. Sleeping on the ground with my mattress I brought along with me from my pervious bedroom. Of course with the blanket. So now no air-con, just fan and no bed stand, just the hard cold floor.
I wanted to move out of the house now and then. I don’t think I can stay there any longer. It’s like a living hell cell to me though it’s a house. My only place I can stay there will be my study room. My dad will always asked me not to stay inside there all the time. But seriously, is there any place or anything I can do when I walk out of that room? I don’t think so. Once mum told me that I bothers her when I’m outside. I didn’t told my dad about it, since he always thinks I’m joking with him. So I kept everything deep down inside my heart. Yes, everything. Along with the memories I sealed from when I was a child till now.
Now, I just finished my third meeting, going to so the quiz. But I’m still typing stuffs in here. Really have no mood to do anything at all. Just finished my quiz, evaluation, and RJ. What’s left was to submit my RJ.